I hate to see when someone is letting a past relationship interfere with the present relationship. I was just asked for some advice on this issue. So I figured this would make a great blog topic. The issue was that this woman had been in a relationship with this married man for years. She finally decided to get out of that dead-end relationship. She has met someone else who is ready to make her his wife, someone she isn’t sharing, someone who can give her financial stability, but most of all someone who loves the Lord. The problem is now that she has someone who can make her happy, she doesn’t know how to let him love her. She was so miserable for so long that she has her guard up and refuse to let it down no matter how hard he tries to show her that he loves her. The sad part is she is about to lose out on the best thing that has ever happened to her. Honestly, I think that past relationship made her forget herself worth. It is almost as if she didn’t feel like she deserves to be love.
Ladies, it is important that you learn yourself worth it if you don’t realize it already. You deserve to be treated like a queen and you should always think highly of yourself. No matter who you have run across in your past, he should not cause you to de-value yourself. You are a woman and wonderfully made. If a man loves you he will never make you feel worthless. He will always try to build you up.
The past man may have hurt you, but ask God to heal. I would hate for you to miss out on a good man, because of the heartache of the last relationship caused you. God loves you and his love can repair the damage that was done to you. This is a good thing to do before you even consider entering a new relationship anyway. And when you finally do meet a new man pray and ask God to reveal to you whether he is the right one. If it turns out that he is the right one, then let him love you like you deserve to be loved and leave the past in the past.
Being single is not a bad thing. I am not sure why some people treat it as a disease. As soon as you get out of a relationship, all of a sudden some people start to look at you with looks of pity. Looking like they are waiting for you to have a nervous breakdown at any moment. Then the next moment you find yourself feeling that same pity for yourself, on top of the hurt you are already dealing with.
However, I don’t see becoming single again as a bad thing. Yes, you are hurting because you are not with that person, but eventually, the hurt does go away. I see it as a time for you to get acquainted with yourself again because many times when you are in a relationship with the other person you lose yourself.
And yep, I said get acquainted with yourself again, because it is important to know yourself again before rushing into another relationship. It is important to take time to heal. This way when you do find that new special someone you will be bringing only yourself and not your emotional baggage from the previous relationship. Because I see so many people making that mistake bring their past into their present. All I am saying is when you’re exiting a relationship is not a death sentence it is a chance for a new beginning if you take your time and get there.
Every Woman Is Special (repost from my old blog)
Every woman is special and should know her own self worth. A woman should never compromise her integrity, her love for herself, or anything about herself that God has given her, that makes her unique. She is a an amazing being, with unlimited potential. She has the capability of completing several of life task, simultaneously, without one compliant. She can be very strong willed and can have the strength of a lioness,when needed. At the same time she can be very gentle, meek, and mild. She has beauty glowing all about, even if at times she doesn’t see it. I guess what I am saying is be careful with who you let have your heart, but at the same time don’t lock it to tight. You don’t want your heart locked so tight that when you run into Mr. Right you scare him away.
“How Do They See You?”
Ladies, you are beautiful beings. No matter what shape, color or size. You are beautiful because God made you. You should always carry yourself like you appreciate that he made you. I have been doing some research and asking questions. The one thing that came from the guys is they treat females the way they portray themselves. I know we are living in a time of women’s rights and we feel liberated, but some men can be just as sexes today as they were 50 years ago. That is why it is so important to carry yourself like a lady even though we do feel liberated. You may not agree with this, but I thought I would share what they were saying. If you carry yourself like a lady they treat you as such, you carry yourself like a gold digger they treat you as such and last if you carry your self like, well you know what I was about to say. Anyway, that is how they will treat you. This is just food for thought.
Do We Know Who We Are Alone?
Today I read a tweet off of twitter that stated” The issue isn’t that you’re alone, the issue is that you don’t know who you are alone.” It got me thinking is that why so many people jump from relationship to relationship. I am just asking. Do we really not know who we are alone? I guess you ask, MzGaPeachy why you asking you have a husband. Well that maybe true, but God forbid if something did happen to my husband would I know how to be alone, after all these years. I am not talking about being single and going to bed at night alone by yourself, but I am talking about no courtships of any kind. How many of us can truly handle just dating ourselves? This even goes for some of the married, with spouses who are deployed or other situations where their spouse is gone a lot. I live in a military town and have seen some things. Spouses having babies with others while the other spouse is gone or the spouse who are gone getting in trouble for fraternizing while they were gone. Is it because they just do not know who they are alone? If this is really true, what can we do to learn to who we are alone, before adding someone else in the mix? I would love to hear tips about learning how to be alone, without looking for a significant other to comfort you, because I would love to write a blog from your feed back.